A Year of Resilience, Part 2

After months of struggling to beat a seemingly endless cycle of sickness for our 3-year-old son Theo (Part 1), we knew we needed a better way forward. No more treating the symptoms and crossing our fingers. It was time to take a more holistic path to healing and finally get some answers.

Hello, Homeopathy

In March we decided to see a homeopath for the first time. My husband had been an unlikely convert to acupuncture and traditional Chinese medicine since it healed his eye problems and allergies years before. His acupuncturist didn’t treat children, but he referred us to Shea Kennedy for homeopathy. We did a phone consult with her, and as it turns out her homeopathy journey began much like ours — on a mission to heal her son. We felt immediately understood and aligned with Shea, said a little prayer, and booked appointments for both the kids that same week.

On the day of their appointments, Theo had been up coughing literally every hour the night before (not to mention the night terrors and ear pain). We were exhausted and desperate. Theo coughed the entire car ride to our appointment. We sat down with Shea and as we tell her our story, she keeps giving Theo these little pellets for his cough — remedies she calls them. And as we pour out our hearts and months of frustration to her, we watch Theo’s cough calm and finally dissipate.

Now I had bought homeopathic medicines at the pharmacy before, but I didn’t really know what that word even meant. I assumed they were more natural — fewer ingredients, no chemicals, back to basics. But watching it work on Theo, I thought this has to be magic.

I know now that homeopathy operates under the idea that “like treats like” (instead of trying to heal with the opposite or antidote of an illness like conventional medicine). Basically, it uses tiny doses of natural substances that could create the same sick symptoms in a healthy person, except they’re diluted so much that the original substance basically isn’t even there anymore. But the energetic signature remains. And your body recognizes it.

The remedy essentially pings your body to heal itself. Crazy, right?

I know that may sound far-fetched and a little witchy or mystical (thank goodness I’m here for all of that), but once I saw how well it worked on our kiddos, I was all in. I felt so good about it being natural, with no side effects. Plus there’s just something so beautiful and empowering about it triggering your body’s inherent ability to heal itself.

Goodbye, Gluten & Dairy

So after Shea listens patiently to our story and all Theo’s ailments, she immediately asks if our house has mold. Apparently all of Theo’s symptoms — the gunky cough, the congestion, the night terrors, the accidents, the ears — all of it is textbook for mold poisoning, especially for kids. We tell her there’s none that we know of (besides a bit we all get in bathrooms from time to time), but we buy a kit from Home Depot to test it when we get home, and since nothing really shows up, we hope we’re okay.

Shea tells us if it’s not mold, Theo could be reacting to some environmental allergen outside or it could be a food sensitivity. She recommends that we have Theo tested for environmental allergies and food sensitivities, but for now we should cut out dairy and gluten (since the extra inflammation could be the cause but the diet change would help Theo feel better either way). She recommended this diet change not just for Theo, but for Iris and I too since she said it could help me with hormonal acne I’d been struggling with for years and Iris with her blisters, since reducing inflammation was key to all our healing.

Stressful times, incoming kid birthdays, and no more gluten and dairy? Yay.

My husband Sam wasn’t sold that food was the problem, but it had been months of struggling to heal our children and I was desperate to try anything that could help. So we decide to give it a try.

Just for a few weeks, we thought. A month tops. Just to see if it helps.

Now at this point, Theo is a very picky eater who lives on PB sandwiches and yellow American cheese, and lives for pizza and donuts. As you can imagine, the transition to gluten-free and dairy-free was rough. I have a few good friends with dietary restrictions, so they shared their favorite recipes and resources that certainly helped. But I really just had no idea how many things contain dairy and gluten. Spoiler: it’s most of the things and so many things you don’t expect.

The hardest thing is it involves so much more upfront meal-planning, you need to bring your own food everywhere you go, and restaurants are basically a no-go, especially for kids. For an adult, you can make eating out work with a salad or a simple protein and veggies, but the kids menu is burgers and buttered noodles and breaded chicken and pizza. It’s basically built on gluten and dairy.

Goodbye for now, restaurants — something fun and easy during a season where we could really use more of that.

That said, once we cut out the dairy and gluten (plus getting the kids on better vitamins and probiotics and starting to use a nebulizer with Theo twice a day), they did seem to get better. Not all-the-way better, but it clearly helped. And these were finally natural means we could feel really good about for our kids. At that moment in time, better was enough.

Yes, this was really hard. But we could handle it. Together.

Seeking the Source & Going Holistic

Now we clearly wanted to find the source of the problem, so we tried asking Theo’s pediatrician for food sensitivity and environmental allergy testing. But they basically told us food sensitivities aren’t real and that we’d have to go through this whole chain of appointments and referrals to get any kind of meaningful allergy testing.

Translation: lots more time and money, and even then we weren’t convinced we’d get the answers we needed.

Meanwhile, homeopathy had become our go-to for any illness or ailment in our home. We had remedies for Theo’s cough and ears, for Iris’s blisters, for my hormonal imbalance, and they all seemed to work remarkably well. Anything that came up, Shea found us a remedy that worked like a charm. Homeopathy was keeping our little family afloat, and it just felt right for us.

Then our family came down with Norovirus, which was the worst virus we’ve ever had by a long shot. My children are vomiting and having diarrhea simultaneously (even little Iris who is less than a year old at this point), and I’ve got a fever and chills while trying to reconcile the advice I’m getting from the pediatrician with the homeopathic remedies that are actually helping. And I know I can’t keep straddling these two different healing paths while caring for my kids.

As Theo and Iris both approached their birthdays, it was time for their annual well visits. All we wanted was to keep our kids healthy, and we were sick of jumping through hoops and getting nowhere with conventional medicine. Shea was our go-to when the kids were sick, but since homeopaths aren’t doctors, we also wanted to have a pediatrician we could go to locally who would round out our care team and would have the ability to write a prescription for the kids should we ever need it.

So we began our search and landed on a holistic doctor that was highly recommended nearby. His practice wasn’t covered by our insurance, but it seemed like most holistic doctors weren’t. We probably wouldn't have made this leap a year earlier, but again we are desperate here. We just want to find answers, heal our children, and feel good about how we’re doing it. Not to mention, we were paying at least that much in copays with our current pediatrician anyway.

We said a little prayer, booked appointments for both the kids, and hoped this would finally lead us to some answers.

A Sensitive Birthday Celebration

Meanwhile, we paid to have Theo’s food sensitivity testing done ourselves (since our pediatrician refused). We figured it would help us know if gluten or dairy was actually a problem, because it had to be just one, right??

Wrong.

We get back the results, and it turns out that Theo is sensitive to gluten, dairy, and eggs too. So now here’s another ingredient that we need to remove from our household and menu that is in basically everything. But I find alternatives, clean out the pantry and fridge, and the kids and I start our elimination diet. No more gluten, dairy, or eggs for us. And I have no idea if this is just for now or for Theo’s whole life.

And this is really really hard.

Now, of course, all of this goes down just in time for us to start planning Theo and Iris’s birthday party. Their birthdays are 6 days apart, so we planned on having one big party for both of them. Except with the kids being sick constantly and the new food restrictions, we’re not in the most festive headspace and we keep the guest list to our nearest and dearest.

It’s April at this point, and Sam and I literally haven’t seen any of our friends since the previous summer since anytime we have plans, the kids are sick and we need to cancel. At this point, we’ve just given up on rescheduling.

But we make the best of it. I find a recipe for gluten-free dairy-free egg-free M&M cookies, and we find a gluten-free bakery with vegan options for cakes. I make gluten-free vegan donuts from scratch with chocolate icing and sprinkles, and we find a dairy-free gluten-free pizza for Theo to eat at the party. We buy balloons and do the best we can to give our kids a special day during this extremely challenging time.

Yes, this is really really hard. But we handle it, together. And we throw the best party we can, and celebrate the precious moments in this bittersweet season, as our beautiful babies turn 1 and 4.

Meanwhile, we anxiously await our appointment with the kids’ new doctor — hoping for the clarity and answers that have eluded us for months.

A Bit of Clarity

The day of Theo and Iris’s appointments with our new holistic doctor arrives, and we’re desperate but hopeful. We sit down in his office, and we tell him our story and all Theo’s ailments. Literally as soon as we finish, he asks us if our house has mold. Because all of Theo’s symptoms — the gunky cough, the congestion, the night terrors, the accidents, the ears — all of it is textbook for mold poisoning, especially for kids.

There it is again. And we realize this can’t be a coincidence.

Yes, we finally had a bit of clarity, but our healing journey was only just beginning. Join me for Part 3 as the pieces finally fall into place.