One Simple Key to Clarity
I remember when the steps I needed to take in life and business seemed crystal clear. When I could see my path stretching out before me like a game of Candy Land — fun and free and easy. Everything felt so certain, and there was no question of what I needed to do next.
These days, that’s hardly the case.
Six years ago, becoming a mom changed everything for me. Then the pandemic did it again. And then our healing journey with mold. These seasons of struggle and monumental change cracked me wide open and made me question everything I thought I knew. And ever since, my path has felt foggy. Scattered. Uncertain.
I can’t see my next steps stretching neatly out before me anymore, but there is one thing I know I can do when I’m feeling lost or stuck in life and business. One thing that helps me find my path again, even if it’s only the next right step from where I’m standing.
Alignment First. Action Second.
When I feel overwhelmed, frustrated, and like I’m floundering for what’s next, my tried and true key to clarity is alignment before action. That means I step away from my to-do list and all those things I “should” be doing, and I align myself first. Before I take action.
Alignment vs. Aligned Action
You might be wondering what I even mean by “alignment.” Alignment is really anything that disrupts your daily grind, gets you out of your head, and gives you the space to find your next right step. I personally find alignment most often through yoga (especially hot yoga). But some days it’s taking a walk outside, a spontaneous dance break, or even just stepping into a room by myself to close my eyes and take some deep breaths. It’s a little different for everyone, but look for the things that get you out of your head and make you feel more like yourself again.
As for aligned action, that’s what you do next — the steps you take in life and business that align you with your goals and dreams. Scattered frantic action has mixed results. Aligned action is focused, intentional, and brings you closer to where you want to be.
Finding alignment before moving forward leads to clarity and empowered action. It’s as simple as that.
How do I know I’m out of alignment?
My telltale signs of misalignment are all the signs of stress, overwhelm, and burnout — shallow breathing, clenched teeth, tight jaw, shoulders up by my ears. Everything feels urgent. I feel frantic and like I’m underwater. I feel like I’m running in circles and getting nowhere. I can feel the pressure rising, and I’m not sure what the next right move is. I’m claustrophobic in my own skin. Any combination of these signs tells me I need some time away to get my head right before I move forward.
Does it really work?
Alignment before action may sound too simple, but it really does work. The days that I dive right into my list without aligning myself first, I find myself pushing ahead blindly, spinning my wheels a lot, and wasting time on things that I later realize aren’t actually that important.
Trying to take action without alignment feels a bit like when kids try to bust open a piñata at a party. Someone blindfolds them and spins them in circles and then says, ”Go ahead! Try to hit that piñata! Candy and treats await!” In this scenario, you’re the kid, your goals and dreams are the piñata, and life is the one spinning you around til you’re dizzy and telling you to go for it. There’s a chance you may make contact, but you’re really just tripping over your own feet, taking shots in the dark.
Meanwhile, alignment before action is more like an archer pausing to focus on the target, see the bullseye, take aim, exhale, and let their arrow fly. The setup takes a bit of time, but the action that follows is focused, decisive, intentional, and often lightning fast because the clarity is there. It’s just a matter of following through.
5 Steps to Alignment Before Action
Finding alignment before moving forward leads to clarity and empowered action. It’s as simple as that. So if alignment is the key to clarity and acting with intention, how do you get there? Personally, I find alignment through 5 simple steps.
01. Step away
When creative block strikes or you’re staring a hole in your inbox or to-do list, it’s impossible to find the clarity you need to decide what’s next. That’s when you need to take a step back and give yourself some space. Seriously, step away.
02. Take some time (for yourself)
When you’re stuck in the grind of your day, everything feels urgent and it’s easy to waste time on things that won’t actually bring you any closer to where you want to be. Taking some time away and filling your cup has a way of bringing things into perspective so you can see what actually matters.
03. Breathe Deep
This one feels like a no-brainer, but how often do we forget? How often do you find yourself breathing shallow, jaw clenched, shoulders up by your ears? Never underestimate the power of pausing to close your eyes and breathe deep. It’s like a palette cleanser for your brain.
04. Align Yourself
Do whatever gets you out of your head and fills your cup. This could be yoga, working out, dancing, or walking outside. But it could also be a bath, a nap, or a meditation session. I find most days it helps to move my body since this moves stuck feelings and energy but some days when I’m exhausted or burnt out, I need something slower and more focused on self care. Tune into what feels good for you, and remember that it’s okay if what you need changes day to day.
05. Pause
You might be tempted to miss this last step, but I find it’s essential to pause and notice how I feel once I’m back in alignment. It’s all too easy to let the world rush back in, but if you stop — even for a moment — to notice how you feel when you’re in the right headspace, it’s easier to hear that voice of clarity and to feel the warning signs when you need a break to center yourself once again.
Remember, this is a process and like a plant that needs watering, you’re never done. Your wellbeing isn’t something you ever really check off, rather something you continue to check in on. Trust me, you deserve this time.
Finding alignment first — before I take action — clears my head, gets me unstuck, helps me feel better, and empowers me to move toward what matters with focus, intention, and confidence.
What to Do When You Don’t Have Time
Trust me, I get it.
I said this path to clarity was simple. I didn’t say it’s always easy. I can tell you from experience that it’s not.
As a working stay-at-home mom, my free time is in short supply. When I get a window of time to myself, it’s easy to feel this immense pressure to be as productive as possible. The more stressed I get, the more I get stuck in scarcity and convince myself that there’s no room on my list for me.
With so much to do and so little time, I must be the thing that falls off the list, right?
In reality, I find the days that I ignore my needs and push myself to do and achieve first are the days I struggle the most. I spin my wheels. I waste time. I spend my precious hours on things that don’t actually matter. And then I feel worse. I beat myself up for wasting my precious time. And then instead of being fulfilled and excited when I put my mom hat back on, I’m a flustered burnt out ball of stress who’s not able to show up as the soul-led entrepreneur or mother I want to be. Days like this have led to more than a few panic attacks and crying sessions.
The truth is that the days I think I don’t have time for myself are the days I need that time the most. You can’t serve from an empty cup, friend.
When I take the time to align myself before I take action in my life and business, I show up as my best self. And even with less time, I’m able to use the time I have more effectively and end up getting more done that actually moves me closer to my goals and dreams. With the clarity there, it’s just a matter of following through.
As for you, my friend, take a moment to breathe deep. Relax your forehead and the space between your eyebrows. Unclench your jaw. Let your shoulders fall back and down. Feel yourself grounded where you sit or stand. Inhale. Exhale.
Make the time, even if some days it’s only those few brief moments. Your business will thank you. Your loved ones with thank you. And you will too.
Trust the Next Right Thing
I can’t see twenty steps ahead anymore in life or business (sometimes I can’t even see two). But when I take the time to align myself first, I am able to hear what my next right step is. When it’s right, I can just feel it. Things click into place and everything feels easier.
Trust that next right step, and trust that the next one will follow after it when the time is right. You just need to be in the right headspace to see them when they arrive.
Even in this foggy season of life, alignment before action is my key to getting unstuck, tapping into my intuition, and finding clarity for what’s next. For me, these days are less of seeing a clear path ahead and more like shining a flashlight into a foggy night.
I can’t see the whole path ahead, but I trust that it’s there beneath my feet, stretching out from where I stand to what’s meant for me. I just can’t see it yet.
How will you find your next right step?
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